- Create new family traditions without forgetting the old. If your husband's children are used to having Thanksgiving dinner with their mother, encourage them to continue that tradition without feeling guilty. But then, invite them to come to dinner another day of the long weekend (unless they are going out of town). Instead of having turkey, make spaghetti, or another favorite dish - make this your annual Thanksgiving dinner at dad's.
- Give the children some time alone with their father from time to time. Suggest that your husband take the kids off to the beach or to an amusement park for the day. Even a few hours of alone time with Dad can let the kids know that they haven't "lost" him to you and any kids you brought to the new family. Rather than complaining or being bitter about being left alone, create a fun family dinner for when they return, or if they won't be home for dinner, make it breakfast, assuming they're coming home to spend the night (rather than Dad taking them straight to their mom's) - or just make it a game or movie night, this time including you in the fun. The important thing, regardless of your living arrangements, is not to monopolize the children's father every second of their lives. Encouraging them to spend time together without you is generous and will strengthen your marriage, the children's perception that you are not a threat, and the children's relationship with their father - it's a win all the way around.
Read more...Begin a Marriage As a New Stepmother - Famly Life Wiki
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